Author: Byron Darden

Storytelling to Create Change

As we move from one extreme to another, we are granted the gift of a story to tell of how we journey as people in our personal lives and leaders in our business or community lives. We tell of our evolution as man and womankind and all the variation in between.

Here are some examples of extremes we may face in our lives and how we can journey from one to the other through story. These experiences impact us in specific ways and define our story. The examples below are just a few of my own that spark stories that brought me from one extreme to another:

Move awayGo ToFor the purpose of
Private TransportationPublic TransportationContributing to fewer emissions issues
ArguingReasoningLimiting unproductive fighting
RushingTaking our TimeLimiting the number of missteps or reducing anxiety
JudgingAffirmingBenefiting from greater curiosity
IndifferenceCompassionDemonstrating care for others
TextingTalkingDeveloping a more human connection
TalkingListeningAllowing others to be heard

How Does Your Story Define You?

Let’s say, for example, that you grew up with some challenges. You could look at your story in one of two ways. Either you are resentful that you didn’t have all of the advantages you felt you should have, OR you picked yourself up, brushed off the dust and moved forward in the face of adversity.

Same circumstances, yet two different stories can emerge. It’s all in the way you tell your story. An example is when I tell the story of visiting the family farm and accompanying my grandmother to gather eggs. It was the event I learned that one must take risks to move ahead in life. Told differently, it could also convey the importance of listening to your elders.

I encourage you to take some time to think about how you present your story to others/your audience. Is your story holding you back, or is it propelling you forward?

Here are some thoughts to get you thinking about your story:

  • How did you get to where you are today?
  • What traumas or triumphs have you experienced?
  • Who was your inspiration?
  • Why did you choose this career path?
  • Why should I listen to you?

No one has the same story – use this to your advantage – to bring a unique perspective to your leadership role.

“Leadership is autobiographical. If I don’t know your life story, I don’t know a thing about you as a leader.”

-Noel Tichy

If you are struggling in your role, defining your story can be a catalyst for change. It can unlock deeper relationships and unearth untapped resources.

Telling a More Effective Story

Want to learn how to tell a compelling story? Begin by telling your story to a child. They forgive your ability while you hone your technique. They will keep you honest when you stray from the tale. Children will also reflect back on what you may want to attend to most when telling them a story.

Draw stories from your experiences in life that have been impacted by where you’ve lived or traveled. Gain inspiration from those who have supported you or let you down. Take your listener on a journey through the events and watershed moments that have contributed to who you are today and map how you’ve come to this moment.

Use stories to convince others to take action in sticky situations, interpret the past, shape the future, address issues, resolve conflicts, or face challenges. Structure your story to fit your objectives and nail the delivery.

Impact of Storytelling

Whether it’s the 70% of companies investing in one form of content marketing or another to transfer knowledge about products, or the 65% of our social conversations that are grounded in personal sharing and gossip, we rely on a story as our main medium of telling our tales that speak to our humanity and our spirituality.

Storytelling can sell a product or alienate a brand. It can raise awareness of social issues and change the course of society. Storytelling can make complex topics more manageable.

Storytelling is a powerful tool when used correctly. Relating facts is not enough. Interweave those facts into something your audience can care for – is invested in. Deliver the story with impact.

Tell Me Your Story

You’re never going to kill storytelling because it’s built in the human plan. We come with it.”

-Margaret Atwood, The Handmaid’s Tale

Those who have followed me may be familiar with my story and what brought me to this point in my career. In the event a Google Search landed you on this article, welcome! Click here to read my story.

My purpose here is to help you discover your gift of storytelling. Whether you tell your own story or use storytelling to accomplish a goal, there is no doubt that a well (or effectively) told story can make an incredible difference in perceptions and enthusiasm.

I’d love to hear your story. Click Here to book a 1:1 Executive Women Breakthrough Session – together, we can explore ways your story can benefit you in the boardroom.

Founder’s Corner

I recently spoke at a conference in Chicago on the topic of Navigating Bold Communication where the topic of Diversity, Equity and Inclusion were not the lead language desired. Instead the focus was on what makes us different and how we can boldly communicate in sometimes challenging conversations despite our differences without needing to turn to human resources for support. It was such a refreshing environment to work with a group who would like to avoid the need to reach out to the corporate mommy and daddy to facilitate how this should be done.

It was during that conference that I began to consider all the ways I am different and how all of us are different from one another along with those ways in which we are similar. That consideration brought me to ponder how differently we each address our capacity for change, learning, leading, and by being curious regarding what we don’t know of one another.

In this month’s blog as we celebrate the American Indian Heritage, I’m struck by how much change we have experienced in this country since 1776 when the US was renamed from its original, “United Colonies.” While the notion of “united” has wavered over time, there continues to be an effort to find new ways to reunite as we also continue to navigate our differences.

It all comes down to capacity for me and so goes what that means about our ability and aptitude to lead well. We all bring different skills, abilities and points of view to how we get work done. That is also true regarding how we lead.

So this month, I want to focus on how we can find ways to expand our capacity to lead, be open and curious about one another and ultimately remind ourselves that we can always learn more, grow more and lead more effectively as we flex our capacity to fit the needs presented to us at any given moment.

Leadership Capacity

What does Leadership Capacity mean? The term has several definitions. Envision a pitcher of water, and the capacity of thatcontainer is how much water it can hold. Capacity also addresses how much a machine (or person) can produce – they are operating at their full, maximum amount. A third definition is how capacity speaks to a person’s role or position.

Leadership Capacity encompasses all of the definitions in one way or another. It can mean many things to many different people. As a business environment ebbs and flows, so does a leader’s capacity.

Four Elements of Leadership Capacity

Four elements make up Leadership Capacity, and they are core to a leader’s journey:

  • Leadership Style
  • Leadership Skills/Behaviors
  • Leadership Character
  • Leadership Ability/Business Acumen

Let’s take a look at each of these.

Leadership Style

This is your approach to situations as a leader and how you will manage teams. In defining your leadership style, you will want to consider how to respond, plan, and guide your team. Effective leaders are able to adapt their style based on the need at the time.

Here are five leadership styles. Do any of these sound familiar?

  • Autocratic – you like to be in charge
  • Consultative – you like to give advice or recommendations
  • Affiliative – you like to form social and emotional bonds with your team
  • Democratic – you consider the input of the team when making decisions
  • Coaching – your goal is to help your team grow and improve performance

 

Leadership Skills/Behaviors

These are the specific and concrete ways you act and conduct yourself while leading your team and performing your role. Some examples are compassion, adaptability, listening skills, confidence, time management, and your ability to handle details well or provide motivation.

Here are common leadership skills that effective leaders possess:

  • Communication
  • Organizational Change – this involves strategy and planning execution
  • Managing People
  • Visionary – you can see what is possible, necessary, or groundbreaking.

Leadership Character

Character combines your values, traits, and virtues. This gets to the heart of who you are and fuels your authentic self. Clarity regarding these qualities will help you build confidence in your abilities to handle situations and earn respect from your team. Spending time in self-reflection about your values and belief systems will significantly enhance your leadership skills.

Character traits of great leaders include:

  • Self-Knowing – this includes being vulnerable, authentic, and acting with integrity
  • Inspiring, Persuasive, Influential
  • Respectful
  • Discernment/Decision Making
  • Team Building/Empowering

Leadership Ability/Business Acumen

Business sense and savvy are crucial for making decisions that lead to effective outcomes. This encompasses industry knowledge accumulated over time and experience in similar situations. It includes understanding known and emerging processes and how to use that knowledge to lead and adapt successfully.

Areas that enhance business acumen are:

  • Education
  • Experience
  • Certifications
  • Continuing Education

Building Leadership Capacity

These four elements are used to build your capacity as a leader. Developing business acumen will lead to adaptability. Developing style will lead to confidence. One has to build a reservoir of capacity to have a foundation from which to draw.

At times, you may feel you’ve reached your limits and are at full capacity. Realize that you have room for more, which signals a time for you to step back to see the 10,000-foot view. Take inventory of what is and what more is needed so that you can step forward and plot how to grow beyond where you find yourself at the moment.

Take this opportunity to acknowledge your strengths and what you do well. Then examine your challenges and growing edges. Instead of attempting to resolve everything that needs work, you may find it more critical and time effective to surround yourself with those who possess the capacity you desire. Good leaders know their capabilities and shortcomings and seek to find answers. This may involve adding a new team member or consulting a subject matter expert to provide a different point of view. Or perhaps you will discover a world of experience from someone else that is not currently yours.

You can also seek professional development activities. The best leaders are continually learning and developing. Books, podcasts, seminars, and peers can provide growth opportunities. Here are some I can recommend:

  • Leadership Programs such as Columbia, Darden, Duke, Harvard, are a great source
  • Harvard Business Review
  • Leadership Engine by Noel Tichy
  • Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman
  • Biographies of CEOs
  • Blogs from ByronDarden.com

The Importance of Building Leadership Capacity

Demonstrating your willingness to grow as a leader shows your team that you are committed. You are developing yourself as a resource they can rely on when situations become challenging. Enhanced problem-solving skills and communication techniques prepare you for unforeseen circumstances.

As mentioned earlier, you do not have to build capacity independently. When you are ready to hire a new employee or bring someone new to your team, choosing the ideal fit becomes imperative. Begin by looking at your needs and determine who can most effectively meet those needs. One way to do that is to consider the capacity a person must have for you to feel confident in your choice to bring them into the fold.