Author: Byron Darden

Founder’s Corner – Somatic Abolitionism, Part 1

It’s February 2022. I’ve just published a blog on restorative self-care. I share in my Founder’s corner my plans for a year of restorative self-care trips, events, and activities in 2020 after far too long of a time without a proper vacation. Then in one weekend my plans are preempted by COVID. Just like everyone else’s plans that year.

Fast forward to March 2022 when I took a trip to Florida as an attempt to make up for what I missed in 2020. Little did I know then that Restorative Self-Care would become a major focus of mine leading right up to today. Since then I’ve taken a deep dive into more ways to restoratively care better for myself and to share what I learn with you. Those of you who have worked with me have experienced orienting, something I learned from Resmaa Menakem, author of My Grandmother’s Hands.

Hi, I’m Byron Darden bringing you another edition of Leading with Purpose on Purpose. As I continue deepening my knowledge, my goal is to deepen yours. So this month and in December, I am introducing you to somatic abolitionism as a way to help you determine where some of your stress may be coming from and how to metabolize the trauma that causes that stress.

We face it every day in our lives at home and at work and given that a reported 77% of Americans alone experience physical symptoms related to stress such as fatigue, headache, upset stomach, muscle tension, and changes in our appetite, I can only imagine the impact on a global scale.

While we may not be able to avoid stress, we certainly can do our part to metabolize the trauma that leads to 2.8 million workers annually according to the United Nations Labor Agency. It is at this point in my founder’s corner when I usually end with, enjoy. Instead, I encourage you to…take note!

Let’s get started on this theme with Embodied Wellness: A Path to Holistic Well-Being

Embodied Wellness: A Path to Holistic Well-Being

Most of us are constantly juggling responsibilities, deadlines, and challenges that can take a toll on our mental, emotional, and physical health. Whether it’s the pressure of a demanding job, personal obligations, or the accumulation of stress from daily life, we often find ourselves feeling disconnected and overwhelmed. Despite our best efforts to manage stress or practice self-care, it’s common to feel like something is missing—a deeper sense of balance, grounding, and ease that can carry us through life’s most challenging moments.

In response to this growing need for a more integrated approach to well-being, many are turning to methods that go beyond surface-level wellness routines. We need something that speaks to the triad of our minds, our bodies, and our spirit. This is where embodied practices come in—philosophies and techniques that help us reconnect with the body and draw strength from within to manage external pressures.

At the heart of these practices is Somatic Abolitionism, a powerful, body-centered approach that encourages us to embrace our full human experience—physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Unlike many wellness methods that focus on mental strategies alone, Somatic Abolitionism emphasizes the importance of tuning into the body’s wisdom as a means of knowing, healing, restoring balance, and cultivating resilience. This is a philosophy for those who seek a holistic way to navigate life’s complexities with confidence and clarity while learning to take responsibility for and the metabolization of that which led to the existing limitations.

Let’s explore what Somatic Abolitionism is, why it’s essential for holistic well-being, and how it can help you manage stress as well as thrive in every aspect of life as a leader.

Continue on to Somatic Abolitionism to learn more.

Somatic Abolitionism

Somatic Abolitionism is an embodied philosophy—a living, breathing set of practices you can adopt to improve your life and build culture in organizations. Much like an athlete builds their strength, endurance, and agility over time, Somatic Abolitionism helps you develop the ability to remain present and active for extended periods. It emphasizes keen observation of what is truly important and valuable in life, making it more than just physical wellness; it’s a practice rooted in the body and extending deeper into the emotional, mental, and spiritual realms. All three of these are key aspects of human culture that profoundly influence how an organization develops and functions.

While the term “embodied” refers to being connected to the body, “embodiment” goes even further. It means living from the organism we identify as the body, rather than just relying on the mind to make sense of the world. By practicing embodiment, we connect with our body’s innate wisdom and experience life from a holistic perspective.

In much the same way an organization can be embodied by its members or employees. As such, the organization is an organism made up of the bodies that give it meaning, live by values, and set out to achieve a mission. It needs the heart of its people to make sense of the world it serves by drawing on collective wisdom and experience. 

For those of you unfamiliar with the origins of Somatic Abolitionism, here is a brief history:

Somatic Abolitionism was developed by Resmaa Menakem, a therapist and trauma specialist, as a response to the profound effects of racialized trauma on both individuals and communities. Menakem’s work draws from somatic therapy, a practice that emphasizes the role of the body in storing and processing trauma. The term “Somatic Abolitionism” refers to the embodied practices that work to dismantle racialized trauma stored within the body.

The origins of Somatic Abolitionism can be traced back to Menakem’s understanding of how trauma becomes decontextualized over time. He explains that trauma, when left unaddressed, can transform from an individual experience into what seems like a part of one’s personality, family traits, or even cultural identity. His work draws on the collective history of racialized oppression, noting that racial trauma has been passed down through generations, impacting bodies across cultures.

Menakem integrates practices from somatic therapy, mindfulness, and ancestral healing to form a holistic approach that goes beyond intellectual strategies. He encourages individuals to confront the discomfort and pain embedded in their bodies, advocating for repeated, communal practices to build resilience, heal trauma, and foster cultural transformation.

Somatic Abolitionism, while deeply rooted in addressing racialized trauma, offers principles that can be beneficial to a wider audience beyond our experienced racial injustices. At its core, the practice emphasizes healing trauma stored in the body, developing resilience, creating more inner spaciousness, and cultivating emotional and physical well-being. These are universal human experiences, as trauma can arise from a wide range of sources beyond racial injustice, such as personal stress, family dynamics, professional pressures, direct and indirect experiences of hate, war, crime, or even the impact of global crises.

Somatic Abolitionism can be understood as a powerful method for addressing any kind of unprocessed trauma, whether it stems from grief, loss, workplace stress, or childhood experiences. Many people experience trauma in ways that become embedded in their physical bodies—through chronic tension, anxiety, or emotional overwhelm. By focusing on embodied practices like breathwork, grounding exercises, and mindfulness, Somatic Abolitionism can help anyone process these feelings and regain a sense of balance and calm.

Moreover, the practice’s emphasis on emotional regulation, resilience-building, and holistic well-being can apply to professionals in high-stress environments, parents navigating family life, or anyone seeking to improve their overall health and organizational culture. It provides tools to manage stress more effectively, create deeper self-awareness, and enhance one’s capacity to deal with life’s challenges.

For example, someone struggling with workplace burnout can use the principles of Somatic Abolitionism to reconnect with their body, observe where they hold tension, and develop strategies for releasing that tension. These practices foster emotional intelligence, which is useful in leadership roles, personal relationships, and any situation where stress management is key.

Ready to put this into Purposeful Practice?

Purposeful Practice

Addressing trauma is important for many reasons, including:

  • Mental Health: Unresolved trauma can lead to anxiety, depression, and emotional difficulties. By dealing with trauma, you can improve your emotional well-being and regain balance in life.
  • Physical Health: Trauma can cause stress in the body, leading to physical issues like chronic pain, heart problems, and other illnesses. Healing trauma helps reduce the risk of these conditions.
  • Relationships: Trauma can make it difficult to connect with others. When you address your trauma, you can improve how you relate to people and build healthier relationships.
  • Breaking the Cycle: When left untreated, trauma can negatively affect you, those around you, and future generations. Healing yourself helps stop trauma from being passed down.
  • Resilience: Facing and healing trauma makes you stronger and better equipped to handle future challenges with confidence.

Overcoming trauma is crucial for overall well-being, as it soothes and lessens the negative impact on mental, emotional, and physical health. Doing so also falls under the heading of restorative self-care.

Where much of our focus is centered on the mind—problem-solving, planning, and intellectual engagement—it is easy to become disconnected from the body’s innate wisdom. The body holds the key to deeper healing, resilience, and clarity, particularly in moments of stress or challenge. This is why developing a practice that emphasizes embodiment is crucial.

The Practice, as I call it, serves a three-prong purpose.

  1. Calming and Centering: You experience a centeredness that integrates your body, mind, and spirit. This inner calm helps you manage stress and anxiety, which is essential whether you’re transitioning into a leadership role or already operating at high levels of responsibility.
  2. Addressing Trauma: Whether you’ve experienced trauma directly, witnessed it, or inherited it from your ancestors, The Practice offers a pathway for processing and healing these wounds.
  3. Restorative Self-Care: Engaging in this practice cares for your whole being. It allows you to face life’s challenges with grace and poise, even in the most difficult moments.

You can incorporate The Practice into your daily meditation or whenever you feel a sense of disconnect. Or simply need to prepare yourself to connect.

Founder’s Corner – Back to School, Part I

When I finished the third grade as a young boy in public school, my parents decided to send me to a private school. I was in a carpool with other students, some going to the grade school where I attended, while others were dropped off at a nearby high school of the same caliber.

It wasn’t so much that I no longer went to school with my neighborhood friends where I was most familiar with the teachers in the community I called home. It was that I was to repeat the third grade. My parents told me that repeating the grade again would offer me the best start to an education of merit. In my eyes, I had failed. It was challenging to think that everyone would figure I wasn’t smart enough to progress to the next grade. I didn’t look forward to that school year.

As school gets started once again this year, not all of us will be looking forward to what is to come. There will be joy and excitement mixed with apprehension and weary anticipation for both school students and adult learners. What can be expected across the board are two considerations: that something new is ahead to learn and how important it is to embrace your inner strength; our focus this month.

Hi I’m Byron Darden with this edition of Leading with Purpose on Purpose. In this month’s blog we will be exploring what it means to be going back to school for all us in one way or another. It is my hope that you will take a step back and recognize that even uncertainty can be met with excitement as we learn new things about ourselves and one another and perhaps have just a little more compassion for those around us who need additional support on this new school year journey. Enjoy!

Welcome to From Classroom to Boardroom: The Leadership Lessons of Back-to-School Season

From Classroom to Boardroom: The Leadership Lessons of Back-to-School Season

As the summer sun begins to fade, I find myself reflecting on a familiar scenario. Across the US and in many countries throughout the world, children are buzzing with a mix of excitement and uncertainty (given the events of the past several years) preparing for a new school year. They’re selecting new supplies, and organizing their backpacks, and some are eagerly anticipating the return to their academic routines while others may not. This annual ritual of preparation and renewal isn’t confined to our personal lives; it has profound parallels in the professional world, especially at the executive level.

In fact, I recently had lunch with marketing executive, Theresa Spinale of an animation studio in the entertainment industry who quickly confirmed that indeed, the fall is a form of going back to school in her industry as well. It’s a time for fresh starts and new beginnings, something Theresa is experiencing as a new job is about to begin for her.

For those of us in a corporate setting, “Back to School” signifies more than just the return of children, or ourselves, to educational pursuits. It’s a powerful metaphor for our own professional journeys as leaders in business and in education. Just as students gear up for new challenges and opportunities, we, too, must continuously prepare, adapt, and set new goals. This season of transition is a reminder that leadership, much like education, is an ongoing process of learning and growth. It’s a time to reassess our strategies, refocus our efforts, embrace the opportunities that lie ahead, and test our flexibility for the unknowns that will inevitably arise during this seasonal transition.

Learn how Fall is A Time for Business Renewal and Strategic Focus.

A Time for Business Renewal and Strategic Focus

In the world of merchandising, back to school is the time for selling school supplies, and new clothes for students, corporate, and education leaders (kids grow like weeds it seems during the summer, and last year’s clothes either no longer fit or are out of date). Socially speaking, it’s a time when students start up a new school year. Time to get back to their friends, move into a new grade; or like me having to repeat a grade in my formative years. It’s a time to learn new things, meet new people, and work with new teachers. So much about the fall is about new and hopefully exciting undertakings. 

Ultimately, Back To School boils down to mean Back To Business. Consumer spending is up. Commerce is waking up. Fashions are about to hit the market. Clients are ready to focus on their budgets mostly defined from October 1 to September 30 in the United States. This makes September a time to be looking at what is next for more than just students.

Fall signals a broader societal transition where clients, companies, and consumers alike refocus on their goals and objectives. This period is characterized by a renewed energy and commitment to progress, making it an ideal time for businesses, educators, and individuals to reassess their strategies, set new goals, and prepare for the final quarter of the fiscal year and the beginning of an education season.

The back-to-school mindset encourages a sense of urgency and a return to routine, providing a natural opportunity to realign with long-term objectives. This can include launching new initiatives, refining marketing campaigns, or focusing on professional development for business and school leaders.

Clients, too, are more receptive during this time, as they shift their attention from summer vacations to planning and executing the next steps in their personal and professional lives. Whether it’s seeking new services, products, or guidance, the back-to-school season creates a mindset of readiness and openness to new opportunities.

Ready to dive deeper? Try Refocusing on Career Growth.

Refocusing on Career Growth

This time of year is significant for families with children returning to school, as it frees up parents to refocus on their careers. Some of those parents are school leaders focused on recovering from the impact of COVID that turned education upside down causing a major shift in the culture of school. The shift in routine that comes with the start of the school year provides parents with the mental and physical space to re-engage with their professional goals. With the daily demands of childcare reduced, parents can reclaim time and energy that can be channeled into career advancement, taking on new responsibilities, or pursuing professional development opportunities that may have been put on hold during the more chaotic summer months.

Likewise in the world of education, the re-engagement gives rise to the need to re-evaluate what it will take to accomplish this idea of re-establishing school culture, trust, morale, and relationships to where they were pre-Covid. This has a direct impact on parents who are in the business world rather than in education. The reality is that these different world contexts depend on and impact one another.

A personal case study of a past experience comes to mind:

I’m living in Boston, MA situated between two cemeteries. Either way I go, I will dead-end at the cemeteries of the community’s past residents. While I do not have children, the township in which I live depends on its residents to support a tax increase to pay for much-needed improvements in the local school system. I vote to increase the tax so that students in my community might have a more palatable opportunity for their education than I had growing up in Texas. 

At some point, I am in conversation with a neighbor in my community who questions my motivation to vote for an increase in the town’s taxes when I do not have children who will benefit. My reason is simple. I may not have children and yet my life is impacted by the quality of education they do or do not receive. Should students not be engaged at school, they are more likely to skip school altogether and become aimless in my community. For a youngster who is at an impressionable age, when education isn’t getting their attention, getting into trouble and being a blight on the community is! 

They are more likely to get involved in gang violence or spend time standing on corners and making it obvious to law enforcement that they are not in school where they ought to be. At this age, youth are more likely to get into trouble and fall prey to unsavory influences that lead to drug use, home break-ins, and other types of unacceptable behavior. I too have to live with these issues when I fail to do my part in my own community. I must do what is possible to support the education that is provided for the neighborhood in which I live.

Education is not just the responsibility of those with children, it is the responsibility of us all to keep our communities safe, and inspire children to remain engaged in worthwhile activities, and motivated to learn. Lesson learned; when any of us fail to pitch in we all lose, not just the children and the families to which they belong. When we look at it as a community effort, we are including everyone within it. 

It can be difficult to look at what is next in your career when your community is in shambles. When you’re working towards promotions, managing more, and taking on different responsibilities, you can be distracted by questioning what is going on back at home. Especially when what is going on back home is not working. When you are focusing on upping your game at work, to become noticed for your contributions to an organization, team, or project, worrying that your home might be vandalized or your neighborhood compromised in some way is a distraction that will get in the way.

Moreover, the back-to-school season isn’t just about younger students; it’s also a time when educational institutions offer courses for adults, making it an ideal moment for anyone considering further education or training. This environment of widespread learning and growth fosters a mindset of improvement and ambition. As professionals, it’s a reminder that our personal and career development are lifelong pursuits, not confined to traditional schooling years.

For leaders to prosper, the holistic view of their lives must encompass the choices they make at home as well as at the office. Leaders know all too well that when their skill level is not where it needs to be, promotions and increased salaries are less likely to happen. Parents are less likely to provide as well for their families and those families without children suffer as well.

Often, this is when I see executives preparing for new roles that demand not only new skills, and also a shift in mindset. The back-to-school period symbolizes a time of renewal, making it an opportune moment to reassess career trajectories and set new goals. 

I help leaders get promoted, and this requires them to be coachable—and open to learning, even when it challenges their comfort zones or existing beliefs. Just as students are expected to adapt to new curricula and environments, leaders must be willing to embrace change and growth, continuously evolving to meet the demands of their roles. Even when what you are learning may seem to go against the grain of what you believe, trust, or what makes you comfortable. 

I recognize that while we may wish for life to go back to the way it was at a time in the past, the reality is that going back to a past time is not possible. Instead, our new selves must find a new way to show up. That is why I find it difficult to embrace the phrase, “new normal.” One might ask, what is normal and that definition is different for different people. Another consideration is that not everything from the past was necessarily working. That is why I find it difficult to embrace the phrase, “in the good ole days.” The truth of the matter is that not everything was necessarily “good.”

I think we might be more effectively served to embrace the possibility of reinvention instead. For instance, who we were and how we did what we did before 2020 is done. It is time to see life for what it is and what it is not. What it is now can be summed up by the advent of hybrid work conditions. It is unlikely we will ever go back to working in an office in the manner we once did. The whole world changed and we will experience less suffering when we embrace new ways of being and doing in all aspects of our lives. Seeing the world through the lens of  “that was then and this is now” can open up possibilities that did not exist before. 

I’ve encountered many moments where learning something new triggered hesitation or fear. These feelings are natural, just as my reaction to repeating the third grade triggered hesitation and fear, especially when the learning process challenges deeply held beliefs or pushes individuals into unfamiliar territory. Yet, in every instance, I’ve used those lessons to grow and to help others grow. The discomfort that comes with stepping outside of one’s comfort zone is often a precursor to significant personal and professional breakthroughs. When you commit to continuous learning, nothing can stop you except the end of your life. Just keep in mind that the number one and two greatest fears of many leaders is presenting in front of an audience and death…in that order! As long as you remain open to new ideas, skills, and perspectives, the potential for growth is limitless, and the opportunities for advancement are boundless.

Founder’s Corner – Back to School, Part 2

As we continue acknowledging what it means to be Back to School and its connection to being back to business, it is important to consider how often we mean back to business as usual. I have a different take that opens the conversation to what it means to be back to business unusually. Here’s why.

Since 2020 very little is as usual as you are sure to be experiencing. Before 2020 the idea of a hybrid work environment may have been true for some. Yet it became true for nearly all as organizations were faced with managing workers’ from home and then moving to splitting their time between office and home. Some brick and mortar businesses closed all together and their businesses are now being run from leaders’ and employees’ home offices.

Virtual meetings skyrocketed from 48% to 77% between 2020 and 2022. Recent research just one year later in 2023 suggests an increase of 66%.

I can only imagine what statistics will say about 2024 considering that at the start of 2018 4 billion people were on the internet. That number grew in 2019 to 4.39 billion people using the internet. And by the start of 2024 5.45 billion people were using the internet. That’s 67.1% of the world population.

While that number may not inform us just how many of those people contributed to the number of virtual meetings that take place, it does suggest that business is not as usual. For example, the people who make a business run well cover a very diverse range that historically may not have always been acknowledged. That lack of acknowledgement is also no longer usual.

Here is an example of what I’m talking about. We have a significant number of celebrations this month that include a range of diverse people in business among which are Breast Cancer Awareness, LGBTQ+ History and National Disability Employment Awareness.

In addition we are observing National Work and Family as well as Global Diversity Awareness. To those we also salute Employee Ownership, Emotional Intelligence, Emotional Wellness, and Financial Planning. The last three of which are particularly significant to what we address here at Triple Axel Executive Coaching for leaders. So this month we are taking into account all these celebrations as the month of Workforce Inclusivity.

Hi, I’m Byron Darden with another edition of Leading with Purpose on Purpose. As we continue our Back-to-School installment, we dive into the value of optimism when it comes to managing people, and how important it is for leaders to grow in their resilience by embracing opportunities and finding ways to continuously learn how to meet the ever-changing demands of leading organizations and developing the people within them. Enjoy!

I’d love to share my story in Lessons from Leadership, Skating, and Relentless Optimism

Lessons from Leadership, Skating, and Relentless Optimism

When I began my formal career in leadership development I wasn’t always a quick study. I was thorough with my studies. I asked lots of questions and listened to many perspectives. I learned that no matter what I thought I knew, or how I felt about others and questioned when I could apply my knowledge, I was continually reminded that there is always room for improvement and other ways of thinking about everything. I remember one of my mentors commenting that of all the qualities I possess, two of my greatest is being a life learner and applying what I learned immediately. I wasn’t one to wait for the “right” moment. I took what I had and turned it into a practice that allowed me to progress quickly. Skating was one of my greatest teachers of those two qualities.

In the sport of figure skating, literally, every second counts. I learned that as a choreographer, technical coach, judge, collaborative partner both as a pair skater and coach, performer, and leader of skaters’ careers as an eligible, competitive athlete. I’ve also drawn on my keen sensibility to advise athletes on where they might go beyond the ice rink. In one case a skater was deciding between pursuing an MBA over a law degree. Every aspect of one’s being in the sport of figure skating is honed and perfected to the greatest degree possible. Always with room for improvement presenting itself in order to continue moving forward. 

Another mentor acknowledged me for being a relentless optimist. I wasn’t sure this was a compliment. Afterall, the word relentless can lead to unpleasantness and cruelty. My awareness of this has pulled me back from the brink of going overboard. Yet, I’d rather be accused of this as an optimist than any number of alternative descriptors of me and my work. No matter what I was up against, even today; I always find a way to do better, work smarter, focus more, and commit myself to let go of excuses and make it happen. 

Your personal Back to School time is the opportunity to hone skills that will make you an effective leader:

  • Communication Style – Learn your style of communication and continue to build on it. Adjust it. Hone it and develop it in order to benefit from it.
  • Interactions – Every interaction is an opportunity to improve your style and effectiveness in communicating well enough to influence outcomes.
  • Feedback – Whether giving it or receiving it, do so humbly and with great appreciation. Even that which challenges you. Then be sure to learn from it.
  • Coaching – Support others as though your career depends upon it. You want to prepare yourself for it to come back to roost to your benefit. And it will!
  • Messaging – Care about what you say, how you say it, when you say it, and to whom you say it. Mike Lipkin’s magical words are powerful when he shares, “Who you are being when you are saying what you are saying. Says more about what you are saying than what you are saying.”
  • Strategizing – In the words of Marshall Goldsmith, What Got You Here Won’t Get You There. Remain on the lookout for what will move you ahead and bask in where you are now so you are grounded for your next leap of faith.

Learn about Resilience, Success, and Tips for Growth.