Author: Byron Darden

It’s Important to Pause

Posted on by Byron Darden

In whatever way you may have experienced it, I’m willing to bet that you have also experienced just the opposite more often than you would like. Particularly in a business situation when the desire to move quickly is paramount for the speaker. In those moments, you’ve probably wished the speaker would pause to give you a chance to process what they have just shared. Yet, they speed through.

The power of pause invites your audience to experience what you already know. It gives them a stake in the action.

Here are the Benefits of Perfecting the Pause:

  1. Allow your audience to think about what has just been shared before a new point is made.
  2. Let the speaker gather their thoughts and think about their next point.
  3. Gives the speaker the opportunity to catch their breath. Deep breathing calms the nerves and the fresh oxygen to the brain maintains the speaker’s focus.
  4. Let the audience take that same deep breath and maintain their focus on the information they are processing.
  5. Creates a connection between the audience and the speaker.
  6. The speaker can read their audience to create that connection and build understanding of the material.
  7. Allowing the audience and speaker to interact with each other regarding the material.
PERFECT THE PAUSE

Pause for Your Audience

Posted on by Byron Darden

How do I know? I’ve spent two decades hearing from numerous clients worldwide to help their managers and leaders develop stronger platform skills during presentations. They want their people to be more effective when presenting to senior leadership and to their customer base. Sometimes it is a matter of simply slowing down during presentations. Mastering your pause is something we can work on together.

An example of this may be that moment when a presentation is in action and the speaker stops to check for understanding before moving forward. It could be that moment when the speaker says something profound and then allows for a moment of silence to let their point land for the listener. Perhaps a moment when a presenter completes a share of content. Then chooses to move silently from one place to another before speaking again on a different point.

MASTER YOUR PAUSE

Practice the Power of Pause

Posted on by Byron Darden

Practically nothing can be more frustrating for the listener than to miss important information because the presenter is in such a rush to share and move on. The next time you spend hours creating a deck for a presentation, take time to actually practice delivering content related to each slide you show. Become benevolent towards your audience by planning pauses throughout your presentation as well as before and after answering questions. Click Here and I can show you how that is possible.

You will also want to pause to check for understanding. Doing so can drastically minimize missed information, time spent backtracking to clarify what was said, and time spent reiterating what you meant because your audience missed what you wanted them to think, how you want them to feel, or what actions you would like your audience to take.

I recall one particular keynote I delivered at an annual conference for a group of four-hundred professionals at the Waldorf-Astoria’s Starlight Roof in New York. The topic was the importance of engaging, inspiring and motivating others in their field. Over lunch one of the conference attendees sought me out and commented on how powerful it was for him when I often paused after sharing a key point. He noted the skill as key for him in establishing me as a truly professional speaker. I thanked him and smiled knowingly.

DISCOVER WHAT IS POSSIBLE

Pause to Consider This Fact

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Most people speak around 150 words per minute in the course of a normal conversation. Those in places of authority such as a US president delivering a State of the Union address slow that down to 100 words per minute. That doesn’t mean that they spoke slower than everyone else, it means they built in pauses. Pauses do not take away from the meaning or target you as someone who doesn’t know what they are saying. The power of pause lies in delivery. Click Opportunity to Explore to learn about your delivery.

EXPLORE

Pause for Excellence

Posted on by Byron Darden

“It’s a transformative experience to simply pause instead of immediately filling up space.”  

—Pema Chodron

Pausing is creative. When done with excellence, it’s an art form that grabs your audience’s attention and prompts them to bring their focus back to your message. It’s a sign of a confident speaker to be able to pause without discomfort. For the speaker or leader, the power of pause enhances their experience. More than just standing in front of a group of people and rattling off a speech, they are creating an emotional connection with the material and their audience. The speaker conveys thoughts and feelings in an informative and personal way. By slowing down and using the power of pause, this connection deepens.

I’m Byron Darden and I’ve been using the power of pause to communicate effectively with my clients and audience. It’s one of the tools you can add to your repertoire to make you a more effective leader. Click Here to book a call. Together we can perfect your power of pause or another roadblock to your success. Just click the button below to schedule your conversation with me to explore your leadership education needs.

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Founder’s Corner

Posted on by Byron Darden

In this season of giving and celebration we found it fitting to give The Gift of Storytelling. One of the oldest traditions of communication, it is through storytelling that we share our beliefs, values and the rules by which we live. As a result, these three aspects of our lives control the way we think, feel and behave.

Therefore storytelling perpetuates life itself. It is a force so strong that we draw from it every day to support habits that keep us going. Stories are our teachers about everything from why it is important to floss daily and brush our teeth following meals, to how we interact with supervisors, peers and subordinates with whom we work.

Stories tell about who we are as individuals and as communities. They teach lessons such as why it is important to take risks in business in order to move initiatives forward. Stories motivate change. Whether it is a change in how you do business or how you will move into the next year as we will all do in just a few weeks as we embark on a new journey in 2023.

Storytelling also serves us in how we look at things. Stories can change the frame so that we are provided with a fresh or new outlook. For instance, one of the hallmarks of my work with leaders and managers is how we use language in ways to perpetuate positive work flows and accomplish business goals. One example is the use of the word perpetuate.

I’ve used the word perpetuate twice in this article. Typically the word is associated with undesirable situations or unfounded beliefs. Yet, when defined by Merriam Webster, it is also defined as: to make perpetual or cause to last indefinitely; eternalized, immortalized. Those are not necessarily negative ways of seeing things. Yet we can allow ourselves to over simplify what we mean without clarification.

As you read this month’s blog, think about how you can tap into your perpetuation of life by developing and telling Your story! To learn more about how we can work together to help shape your story to perpetuate what is important to you in your leadership, click the button below and let’s explore.

Explore Storytelling

The Gift of Storytelling

Posted on by Byron Darden

When we were little, we told grand tales about what we wanted to be when we grew up. I wanted to be a figure skater and join Ice Capades. Now that we are older, we tell stories about what we did over the weekend or what happened to us while fetching groceries. “You’ll never guess what happened to me today!” we exclaim to our partner as we burst into the door at the end of the day.

Everyone tells stories, and everyone has a story to tell.

This month, we examine how storytelling defines us as a person and a leader. We are looking at storytelling as a gift you can develop.

A good story draws in your audience. It has credibility and truth. It gets your message across and entertains you at the same time. It evokes emotions and inspires actions.


Storytelling impacts almost every aspect of society. Movies, sitcoms, documentaries, commercials, print ads, newspaper columns, TikTok videos, you name it – are all stories. Marketing a product, sales pitches, or even sharing stories about yourself in the boardroom to provide a particular point of view (POV) involves storytelling.

What is Storytelling?

Posted on by Byron Darden

I’ve been telling stories my entire life. Yet, when I thought about how I define storytelling, I was challenged to find words to describe one of the oldest forms of communication.

My approach is probably much like yours when you need quick information. Google it! I have to say, the definition that powerfully captures my thoughts and feelings on the topic comes from Olivier Serrat. “Storytelling is the vivid description of ideas, beliefs, personal experiences, and life lessons through stories or narratives that evoke powerful emotions and insights.”

This definition effectively covers the various aspects of storytelling. It inspires connection and imagination. It puts the speaker in command of their audience, and they hang on to each word with great attention. It gives storytelling a purpose.

Effective Storytelling

Posted on by Byron Darden

Storytelling is as old as humanity itself. Before the advent of paper and ink, stories were passed on from generation to generation. Sitting around telling stories was a way of passing history and sharing wisdom. I recall my grandfather’s wonderful stories about the horse that tried to get away and how he wrangled that mare into submission and got her to “simmer down” and fall in line with the rest of the horses on the family farm.

Evolving from the oldest form of communication, cave drawings transitioned to the spoken and then written word over time. It has since advanced to electronic mediums and through song, dance, cinematic treatments, and live theater. Living here in New York, I get numerous opportunities to see live theater and experience the telling of story in a multi-media treatment that includes song, dance, projected images, live performance, and other high-tech ways of bringing the story to life for the audience.

Effective storytelling is achieved by a number of devices, techniques, and processes. Back to that Google Search on what makes a compelling story. The results show some common themes.

  • A story must have a purpose. Otherwise, you are just speaking to be heard. When a CEO presents a concept to their company, the purpose is to motivate the team and increase the bottom line. To do this, the CEO sets the foundation with a story. It defines the why.
  • The story has to be geared toward a specific audience. Storytelling builds a relationship with the listener. Should your audience be software engineers, talking about baking cookies will probably not fly (I suppose this does depend on how well you tell a story.).
  • A story should connect you, your product, and your audience. Compelling stories resonate with the listener and evoke emotion. Pull your audience into the story by emphasizing what’s in it for them.
  • Cater your story to the medium you are using. You can use facial features and gestures to get your point across should you tell a story in person (or through a video). Use personal narratives and visual representation in the event you tell a story through email or print. Grab the audience’s attention and leave a lasting impression.
  • To sell a story, the most compelling message tends to come from your heart. You are the storyteller, and you are what makes the story authentic.

Importance of Your Story

Posted on by Byron Darden

We share our culture, beliefs, and ways of life through stories. We champion our strengths and successes, teach life lessons, and expose our vulnerabilities and shortcomings. These are the stories of leaders.

As people, we are believed to be hardwired to respond to stories most over alternative forms we use to share information. What’s more effective, a list of dry facts and figures or an interwoven story that puts us in the heart of the action?

The resulting impact of the story on the brain contributes to the production of “oxytocin.” The hormone, often referred to as the “love hormone,” increases during hugging and orgasm. It also benefits us in treating depression, anxiety, and intestinal discomforts. Oxytocin also contributes to maternal behavior and social bonding.

Oxytocin also builds trust, which is one of storytelling’s primary goals. I experience this when working with groups of leaders within an organization. When I share personal stories, each with a clear point focused on the topic, a connection emerges from the group that allows them to trust whatever lesson I am teaching at that given moment.

Case in point: I recently watched a short series on Netflix titled Luckiest Girl Alive. The lead character, TifAni, tells the story of how she was raped in a private boarding school. Soon after her essay is published in the New York Times Magazine, Ani (the shortened name she goes by as an adult) receives one message after another from other women praising her for her courage to tell the truth. This prompts each of the women who message her to share their own stories of being taken advantage of at some point in their lives.