I recently worked with a manager in a large global firm in developing their equity partnership skills. Early in our coaching relationship, I noticed a lack of partnership when setting up each professional development session. I found myself routinely exchanging numerous emails to get a session scheduled. Sometimes weeks would pass before we could settle on a firm date.

I discovered that the manager seemed to drag out the time between sessions by offering little detail or simply incomplete details. This required me to send numerous emails asking clarifying questions that rarely seemed to be answered the first time. It got to the point where I felt I was more responsible for their leadership development than they were willing to commit to for themselves. It was only a feeling, mind you.

The next time I received a cryptic email lacking the necessary information to book the next session, I drew from past behaviors instead of sending a response with numerous questions. I brought them to the manager’s attention as they applied the same challenges and goals we set to grow their leadership acumen. The manager acknowledged my point and provided the most detailed and complete correspondence, bringing back-and-forth emails to an abrupt end.

Lesson Learned: When developing your leadership capability, look at how your challenges and successes align with the growing edge goals you set for yourself to develop. We lead as we are and how we behave.